Self-Care: Not An Either/Or

July 21, 2017

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  • Lovely writing. Excellent advice which I will put to use.

  • TRUTH, sister! I love this!

  • Amen. Except for the part about pineapple and jalapeno on pizza…

    • But … have you TRIED it?

  • Having recently been diagnosed with cancer, and now going through chemotherapy, I have given myself permission to care for myself in simple ways like taking naps, telling people it’s not a good time to visit, and spending hours reading or knitting when I might have done something “more productive.” It’s been very liberating, and people have responded wonderfully. I hope I can carry on these practices when I’m out the other side of this. Too bad it took a serious diagnosis to get me here.

    • Ah, Judy – sending you love and permission and healing vibes. Let me know how you go. xox

  • I like the analogy of putting on your own oxygen mask first. If I don’t take care of myself first, I soon won’t have the ability to care for anyone else.

  • I am enjoying reading this series very much, and every article gives me some food for thought. Thank you, Max.

  • For my birthday this year, I decided that my gift to myself would be to use the phrase “let me get back to you” instead of immediately saying yes to every request. I feel like I have an 8-year-old girl living in my brain who just wants everyone to like her, and she pipes up whenever someone wants my time and energy. This has left me overworked and resentful when I’ve agreed to things without pausing for thought.
    Anyway, I tried it for the first time last week, and it was so wonderful to have the time and space to consider what I wanted. And to have Liberation from the insecure little girl in my head. It was in your column that I first received this inspiration, and I thank you!

    Ps that phrase- “can I get back to you?” Is amazing and powerful and beautiful. I have been practicing so I won’t say “yes” out of habit. I believe everyone who habitually says “yes” without thinking should try it.

    • Can I get back to you? DEFINITELY going to try this out.

    • This is so very good, Meredith! That automated Yes is so powerful that we really must replace it with another automated response, rather than hoping for the best. We should have a whole article about this!